Wow!!!! Isn't that scary??? You always know your children take on your traits, but somtimes, it's just plain scary. :)
This past weekend, Alyssa and I got our hair cut. She loves her new do and she is absolutely adorable, even if I do say so myself. She was so looking forward to going to summer camp on Monday to show her friends her hair. So, we got moving and made sure we had plenty of time to flat iron her hair to straighten the natural curls, and in her terms, "make it not so bumpy!"
Unfortunately, there were some children at camp that decided to tell Alyssa they didn't like her hair and made fun of her. She was so sad when I picked her up that I wanted to cry. She said, "that's why I wanted to wear a hat, mom, so no one can make fun of me." HEARTBREAKING!
She is ONLY 6 and is already experiencing the rejection that comes along with other children who are not taught, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." We were graciously given another chance to step in for God and help His little Princess feel as beautiful He thinks she is.
So we had the typical responses for her:
- "If they were really your friends, then they wouldn't make fun of you."
- "Do you like you hair?" "Does mommy and daddy like your hair?" "Didn't everyone at church like your hair?" Yes...yes...yes......"Well, then that is all that matters."
- "If the kids keep on saying it, then tell them to just stop looking at you."
- "Sometimes, hunny, people say mean things when they are jealous." (Of course, we had to explain the term, "jealous.")
Her Tuesday went much better and we are past that moment. But it was just a small reminder, of the hurts that are still yet to come.
Lord Jesus, please help us to seek out your ways of preparing our daughter for the difficult and trying times ahead. Father, provide us with the tools that we will need to guide her and the tools that she will need to stay strong through the trials. AMEN
(Please share your thoughts on the subject; I would love to hear from you.)
"It's the pain of jealous people-sometimes our closest friends and co-workers- that hold us back from seaking our dreams and really being who we are called to be in Christ."
4 comments:
(Commenting on your quote at the bottom) i just was reading in "a confident woman" how these comments or cultural styles on people (especially women) have been around for ages. joyce meyers states over and over again, it doesn't matter what you've been told about yourself, because God doesn't listen to other people's opinions or even our own, he knows what he made and scripture goes over and over how we are beautiful and fearful. satan hates women! our gender gave birth to JESUS!!! like it says i think somewhere in genesis 3:15 "god put enmity between you and the woman and between your offspring and her offspring. He will bruise and trad your head underfoot and you will lie in wait and bruise his heel" our offspring bruise his head! we have to cover our women! our offspring, speak the words of life into them, show them their worth!
i always look to mothers has how i want to be-and i pray that i have the strength to believe how god sees me before He asks me to teach my daughter to believe it. how much easier will it be for her if i start the day she is born, speaking those truths into her life. keep speaking it sister! you are doing a great job of staying tough and calm (i would have wanted to beat those kids!)
Gail,
That picture of Alyssa is crazy!!! We've always known she was adorable, but whoa, she DOES look like you! I showed Bobby and we both agreed. = )
Take care and look forward to seeing more blogs. Hey! I have been writing in mine and got it set up!!! Talk to you later!
Luv,
Nanette
I don't know you or your family, however, I have been reading your lifestories and really felt your daughter's pain. Some children like to "push buttons" in others because they themselves have never been praised and therefore have a low self-esteem.
When I was a missionary in S. Korea, I heard a story about the way crabs will act in a bucket. If one is able to reach up and grab the top of the bucket, the other crabs in there will try to use him to climb out and in the process pull him back into the bucket. The moral was that do not do anything that makes you stand out because the rest will bring you down to their level.
Encourage your daughter to find her value from within and not to focus on what the others say. To many, change is frightening and they will say and do anything to be comfortable and gain power over others. Remind her that true power is in the Lord and He approves of us as we serve Him.
Hey gail!
I just wanted to say that when I read this, right after I see the picture of this BEAUTIFUL girl starring at me, it made me sick to my stomach! The enemy hates our success, our blessing, our legacy. He wants to spit on our lives and curse us... Your child is the head and not the tail (DEU 28:13)... I have a stirring in my spirit to speak peace and acceptance over Alyssa..
You know? can we not all identify with what she experienced? And what we have as a "come back" is "that's how some people are, honey..., we must try and forgive them" that is what Jesus has commanded.. but then there is frustration, hurt, and scarring that remains... this we can choose to turn into GOOD, we place these things on the throne and pick up the ARMOR of GOD, faith righteousness, salvation, truth... THE TRUTH, that even when we are our ugliest( no makeup, bad hair day,etc..), WE ARE BEAUTIFUL IN HIS SIGHT and HE LOVES US!!!!
Gail, keep on doing what you doing, speaking life into your daughter...
Pray that she can use this experience as a learning and loving tool, a remembrance on how to treat others when she sees a wrongdoing like the one done to her! I pray peace and healing over you and your family!!!
Jesus...He loves and lives in you!!!
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